Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Too Long But Not Where It Counts

You see someone with a truck, you think (besides the traditional "Redneck Alert"), "There goes someone who, more than likely, works hard for a living. They probably lug lumber, machine parts and hooker corpses for a living. God bless 'em!"

But then you see a truck owner parked like this. How LAZY is this person for not pulling forward two more feet? Two feet!!! It's not like it's a Flintstone vehicle where you propel it with your feet. It does all the work for you!

Yep, it's a long vehicle. And yep, it's got a shin killing hitch sticking out the back, making it extra long. But it's made you park like a complete ass. I think truck dealers should warn you before buying a monstrosity like this.

"Just to warn you, sir. By purchasing this vehicle, you're agreeing to take up a minimum of two parking spaces everywhere you go and be hated the world over."

"Why, that's alright. Ever since my sister and I had our third child, we're pretty much shunned by society. Where do I sign?"

*Conversation completely fictional. Any semblance to real events purely coincidental. Now squeal like a pig for me.

Solution? I don't know. Either forced Smart Car ownership for a year or put this truck in a compactor for a minute. Resize it so it'll fit in a stall properly.

And for the driver? Learn To Park, Jerk!

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