Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Yessah, Mazda! I Parks REAL Good For Ya!

Reader submitted. Thanks for taking the time to be as big a jerk as me! Score!

Passenger vans. By themselves, they're fine. But add a soccer mom with three bastard children who scream, kick and whine until Mommy wipes their asses and takes them for a soft serve treat and you get the latest edition of 'Parking Like A Retard'.

Either you're preoccupied with your stretched out vagina muscles (hey, you've got to pay the rent. I get that!) or this piece of shit van is too much vehicle for you. Whatever the case, you really need a public ass kicking, a boiling lava enema AND some Kegel exercises.

On behalf of all the good drivers in Florida, smarten your ass up before someone does more than take a picture of your epic failures.

Learn To Park, Jerk!

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